we couldn’t even do it for you mom
your 2 daughters
22 months apart
couldn’t stop the hate
even as we stare at the mausoleum
where the silver cross shines
in the morning sunlight
as we tried to stand next to each other.
there’s too much
for these 2 daughters to stand next to each other
i will love your memory mom
enough for the entire fucking time
until i join you.
despite not being a group therapy kind of chick, i decided to try another group. stress management.
there were only 5 of us in the stress management group. hmmmm. no one else is fucking stressed? only 5 people.
per usual you had the creepy guy who was way too complementary…
i go back and forth on my computer screen
between match.com for my father
looking at photos of my deceased mother and myself cheek to cheek
each drinking a frothy cappuccino
i prayed to my catholic god, please take me
i was no good to anyone
my mother was good to everyone
my catholic god never brought her back to me
or to all that adored her
despite my many drinks
my many prayers in front of my bathroom mirror sobbing to take me
bring my mother back
as soon as possible please
despite my wishes my catholic god has kept me alive the 2 years she has been gone
i think how unfair my catholic god is being to me
to the rest of us.